Christmas Dad Jokes: A Selection Guaranteed To Get You Maximum Holiday Laughs

Christmas dad jokes are a classic part of the festive season. Some are truly terrible and are guaranteed to make at least one person at your Christmas table groan. Some of these would be perfect if you’re planning on making your own Christmas crackers. Here’s some of our favourites.

 

christmas dad jokes

 

Christmas Dad Jokes About Elves

 

What Do Santa’s Little Helpers learn at school?

The Elf-abet.

 

Why did Santa’s little helper see a therapist?

Because he had low elf-esteem.

 

What’s every elf’s favourite type of music?

Wrap

 

What do elves post on Social Media?

Elfies!

 

What is an elf’s favourite sport?

North Pole Vaulting

 

Christmas Dad Jokes About Santa

 

Did you hear that Santa knows karate?

He has a black belt.

 

What kind of motorbike does Santa ride?

A Holly Davidson

 

What’s Santa’s favourite type of crisp?

Crisp Pringles

 

What does Santa eat for breakfast?

Frosted Flakes

 

What says Oh Oh Oh?

Santa walking backwards.

 

Christmas Dad Jokes About Snowmen

 

What do snowmen call their offspring?

Chill-dren

 

What do you call a snowman that can walk?

Snow-mobile

 

What did one snowman say to the other?

Do you smell carrots?

 

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite

 

What do you say to a stressed snowman?

Chill Out!

 

Christmas Dad Jokes About Reindeer

 

Where do Santa’s reindeer stop for coffee?

Star-bucks

 

What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees?

Hornaments

 

Why don’t reindeer like picnics?

Because of all their ant-lures

 

Why didn’t Rudolph get a good report card?

Because he went down in history.

 

Why does Scrooge love reindeer so much?

Because every single buck is dear to him

 

Christmas Dad Jokes About Everything Else!

 

What does a grumpy sheep say when someone says Merry Christmas?

Baa humbug!

 

Why wouldn’t the Christmas tree stand up?

It had no legs.

 

Why can’t penguins fly?

They’re not tall enough to be pilots.

 

Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?

A mince spy

 

What’s every parent’s favourite Christmas carol?

Silent Night