The start of a new relationship can be exciting and magical and leave you with butterflies. A simple “Good morning” text from your new love can bring a soppy smile to your face for the rest of the day, and just the memory of your last date can help make even the most tedious of tasks seem more enjoyable.
However, the beginning days of a new love is also a tumultuous time, and many new relationships can break up before the end of the third month. There are a few common reasons why a new relationship can go wrong, and if you want your love to last, they are a few things to avoid.
Don’t change who you are
Of course you want to make a good impression on the first few dates by dressing well and glossing over any bad habits you may have, but it’s important not to be afraid of letting the other person see who you are, and that includes any parts of yourself that you might think of as bad parts.
If you feel as if you have to put out a perfect version of yourself whenever you’re with your new partner, then it’s not a good sign. You don’t want to be walking on eggshells forever. One day they’re going to have to see that you don’t wake up looking picture perfect, or that you don’t really love rugby as much as they do. Best to be yourself, and the whole of yourself, in the beginning.
Don’t be too “picky”
This isn’t to say that you should “settle” in any way. You should want to be in a relationship because you want to be with the other person, not because you think that they’re the best you’ll ever manage to get. That doesn’t mean that your perfect partner will be actually be perfect though.
Try not to go into the relationship with too many ideas of what you want the other person to be or do. A relationship can work even if one of you is a video gamer and one of you isn’t, or if one of you supports Labour and the other one supports the Lib Dems. Throw your mental checklist out of the window and see what happens.
Don’t move too fast
This is a mistake that it’s all too easy to make. In the early days it’s easy to become infatuated and want to spend all of your time with the other person, but if you’re setting out your wedding plans and thinking of the names you’ll give your children after only a week of dating, you’re pretty likely to scare them off. Too much, too early, can be too much pressure.
Also, if you spend every waking moment with your new partner, your friends and everyday life can suffer. Try not to get so caught up in the whirlwind that you end up not seeing your friends anymore! Besides, if your new relationship takes over your whole life too quickly, then if it does go wrong you can be left feeling totally lost with nothing in your life to help distract you.